Good Days

 This truck has been passed down from sister to sister for all the little ones in our family. 

 Daniel and Lydia love it as you can see!!

Hello All!  Things are starting to get a little more settled around here.  We are getting into a routine and the kids are really connecting well.  We had our first visit from the social worker on Monday and she thought the kids were doing fantastic. She was very pleased with how attachment was going and allayed a lot of my fears and insecurities. Both kids are really making great strides in their English words and understanding which is huge. Attachment is such a huge deal with adoption.  It has huge ramifications for future development and relationships so we have to take it pretty seriously.  I have to admit it was consuming me and I was feeling completely insecure about my parenting instincts so the visit from the social worker put me at ease and I feel like I can relax and enjoy them a little more.  Just a note about that.  If you should happen to stop by or see us at church in the future, please don't pick them up or try to hold them.  We really need to meet their needs right now and it can be confusing and overwhelming to have strangers trying to hold them.  They have no idea how much everyone has anticipated their arrival!  We love the encouragement and support you all have been to us and believe me, in a few months we will welcome the extra attention!! My mom is here for the week and it has been such a boost for me.  We are being careful about me meeting all the needs of the kids and them coming to me or Jay with their needs, but it's been so nice to have her support and insight.  Today I was able to have a play date with a friend and her two little ones.  She also has bigs and littles so she was a huge encouragement to me.  One huge accomplishment today was that I got them both down for a nap at the same time for two hours!! I'm not holding my breath that it will happen again anytime soon, but it was such a breath of fresh air!  A few funny things around here.  One night when Jay was putting the kids down Lydia yells out Dunde and Daniel responds, "Eh".  Then we heard them doing that once in a while throughout the day.  So now we all will give a little shout out of Dunde and wherever the littles are they will yell Eh!  It's a riot!  Another funny quote of the day...Jay was holding Daniel and had just let Belle (our dog) out and was watching her poop outside when I said I needed to ask him something.  He says back to me, " I've got a lot going on right now, so if you could wait a little while that would be great."  I turned around to see him watching Belle poop and said, "Really?"  We both burst out laughing!  We're trying to figure out meal time because we usually get the little ones food together, pray, then get our food.  By the time we sit down to eat, Daniel has already finished most of his food and is about ready to get down.  I think we need to give him his food last!  He is an eating machine!! We are all getting used to having little hands around too.  Poor Jase left his glasses on the end table and Lydia got ahold of them and broke them.  Huge bummer!  Hopefully we won't have too many more casualties before we figure this out.   That's life at the Mundingers!

LIfe is OK

So, every morning I wake up with a little pit in my stomach remembering that this is still my life and I have to face another day in the grind. But every afternoon I realize, "Hey, life is OK!" We're figuring this out!  It kind of feels like the movie Groundhogs Day.  Daniel and Lydia have really warmed up to the older kids and want to play with them which is really nice. They're getting used to the big kids coming and going and are excited to see them walk in the door when they come home from one of their events.  They absolutely love their play kitchen downstairs.  They play with it for a half hour at a time sometimes. We are also getting a lot of use out of our lower basement.  They will throw and chase balls and ride the tyke bike around.  While Jay and I, Sally and Jack were playing with them Jay was wrestling with Jack and Daniel jumped on top of them.  Daniel had a belly laugh that was so contagious!  I stopped and looked at him and thought to myself, " I wonder if his birth mom ever got to listen to that laugh".  It's hard to believe it was just six months ago that he was found and I don't imagine there was a lot to laugh about.  Thank you, Jesus for giving me your eyes for just a moment.  I pray for both their birth moms and hope that somehow they know that their little ones are safe and loved and well cared for if they are alive.  Maybe I'll meet them in Heaven some day and we can enjoy his laugh together. 
Another thing that has been a blessing in parenting little ones again is that Jay and I have matured so much in our relationship.  I remember when the older kids were little, if Jay got to do something or go out, I wanted my time too.  Or if I got up all night with one of them, I would let him know about it so he would feel guilty for getting a good night's sleep.  Little things that I am ashamed to admit. But this time around, we are both looking out for the other, trying to give each other time to get out or do something with one of the older kids. Recognizing when one needs sleep and offering to get up.  We are on this hard journey together and are both more willing to sacrifice for the other.  God has strengthened us for this difficult time.  No, we don't have the perfect marriage.  We still get irritated with each other, and have different ideas of how we should handle situations, but overall God has blessed us with a nice rhythm together right now.

Here's a few more pictures.  Sally came downstairs today and I was picking things up.  I came across a dirty sock and stuck it in my wasteband so I would remember to bring it upstairs to the laundry.  It did look a little funny and Sally got a good laugh because I was just going about my business thinking nothing of it.  She snapped a picture, so I am humbly sharing it with you along with some good pics of the kiddos.  Good night!

A Good Day...

Today was a good day.  I have decided to write just a little bit because it was a good day and I am working on recognizing the good.  My wonderful friend Bridget reminded me to focus on the good by asking "what are the positives right now?".  I have found myself focusing on how much I miss things or how my life is so different now and all the challenges.  While all of this is very difficult, there are a lot of positives as well.   We had a great evening as a family.  It finally felt like our complete family, not the bigs and littles.  Daniel and Lydia read books and played with Jack and Charlie in the family room while Jay and I sat on the couch.  We had a great family dinner then went downstairs for some play time.  Jack worked on his hitting and Jay put Daniel and Lydia behind the pitching net while he pitched to Jack.  They loved it!!  After Jack hit a bucket we all picked up all the balls and put them back in the bucket, then they proceeded to throw the balls at Jay and I and we picked them all up again!  Good times!  We came upstairs and before you know it, it was bath time!  Daniel allowed me to play with him and interact with him even while Jay was around, which very rarely happens.  Yesterday was a harder day so it was such a blessing to have a good day today.  Praying for tomorrow!  I got an email from my friend in Chad Africa who has a very difficult life to say the least.  She said her prayer for me and for herself was that we would rest in God in the daily grind as well as experience God's rest upon us. Please pray this with us!  Jay has a dinner meeting tomorrow night so I will be handling the bedtime routine alone.  Please pray that it goes smoothly.  Thank you again for your continued support!  

Life as we know it!

Well, life as we know it has certainly changed as you all know, but we are trying to lean into the new normal.  We are trying not to focus all of our attention on the little ones and trying to allow them to play in the vicinity of where we are at. They did pretty good.  They emptied out a few drawers from the kitchen, but nothing harmful.  They are beginning to repeat our words and trying to learn the language.  They understand so much and can follow directions pretty well.  Daniel is delayed with his language anyways so we are really working on helping articulate. We gave Daniel a tyke bike for his birthday that he loves pushing around on.  It's great for strengthening his leg muscles.  Jay taught him how to go up and down the stairs holding the bannister, also very good for building up strength in his legs.  We were able to go to church for a little bit this morning. We arrived 5 minutes late and snuck in the back and lasted until the music was over before sneaking out again.  We didn't get to talk to too many people but it was great to be out among our church family, even if just for a few minutes.  We are really cautious about getting them out in public places because of all the sickness that is out there.  They don't have any immunities built up for our viruses and the flu could be a huge setback for us. We are settling into somewhat of a routine.  They know we pray before we eat and put their hands out for us to hold them as we pray then both say "amen" when we are done and giggle.  Then they get down to the serious business of eating!  Before bed we do baths, cream all over their bodies and hair, PJ's, then to the bedroom where Daniel turns off the light and we all lay down on the huge mattress on the floor.  Lydia has to cry for a minute, then settles down and Daniel has to use the bathroom card saying "Po", to which we say good night!  It takes him about 15 minutes usually to settle down.  Not too bad for a few weeks!  Please pray that we can figure out some sort of naps for them.  They get so crabby in the afternoon because they are tired and obviously need the naps!  Also pray that Daniel will feel secure enough to gain attention in positive ways instead of negative.  Praise that he is responding much better to me.  Jay is still the obvious favorite, but he does allow me to comfort him and interact with him so much more.  Here is our first family picture taken by Steve Wirtz on Sat. afternoon. 

 



 

Survived Alone!!

Jay had to be gone all day today from 6:30 to 7:30.  I have to admit, I was really nervous to brave it on my own.  I was so grateful to have Jay's mom come help for the morning.  She is such a God send and has such a special way with Daniel.  She truly helped me keep my sanity.  God was good in that Lydia slept until 7:30, only waking up two times and Daniel slept until 8:30.  I was able to send the kids off to school, drink a cup of coffee and have a quiet time!  Huge blessing!  We finally figured out a tactic for getting Lydia down to sleep.  We put a twin mattress down on the floor next to the double mattress and Jay and I layed down with both the kids.  She cried for a little bit but fell asleep relatively quickly and slept without coming into our bed.  I think the crib was freaking her out so we are doing things African style now. Praise God for giving us the wisdom to give it a try.  A couple of things that gave us a laugh are; While putting them down tonight Sally and I were singing Jesus Loves Me as I do every night, and she was singing along with us interjecting words like know, so strong.  It was so precious! She already knows the song and hopefully will know that Jesus truly loves her more than she can imagine!  While I was lubing Daniel up with cream after his bath, he lifted up his legs revealing his bare bottom and tooted really loud....stinky, but we both got a good laugh out of it.  I have to say, God really showed himself faithful to me today.  It was definitely the hardest day for me without Jay, but I had a lot of support.  After Jay's mom left, later in the afternoon my dear friend came and organized the kids closet, removing the too small clothes and replacing them with the clothes that fit.  What a breath of fresh air!  She was so patient with Daniel who needed to touch every piece of clothing that was his and point to himself every time she put it in a pile.  What an amazing friend!!  Also, Daniel and I had a bit of a melt down at about 4:00.  He craves attention so desperately that he does negative behavior to get us to focus on him.  This is so difficult when the other kids are coming home from school and I want to hear about their days.  My dear friend called me at just the right time and prayed with me over the phone.  I took Daniel for a drive and we both calmed down and were ready for dinner.  My sister-in-law called to check on me as well.  The support system we have is overwhelming!

Every day gets better!

Hi All!  Well, I am going to try to post something but I have to warn you I don't know how coherent it will be.  I am exhausted!  I know we were called to do this, but it doesn't make it easier right now.  Jay continues to remind me that every day gets better and I know it does, but in the middle of it it's hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel.  I have decided to follow the example of a dear friend and start a blessing notebook so I am aware of  the way God is showing himself to us in the midst of it all.  Here are some of the blessings:  Daniel loves to look at pictures, especially pictures from Africa.  He looks at the picture, then points to himself.  I  know he is trying to figure it all out and figure out how he fits into all of this.  It is a joy to see him find comfort in the pictures.  Both of the children love the bath and we get the most amazing giggles during that time.  We all had a good laugh last night when I was singing to Lydia to help her get to sleep and she whispered "Mbuyo" at me.  She is really fighting sleep.  I think she is afraid to sleep for some reason, which makes me sad. She is restless all night long. After a 45 minute battle, I came down to a cup of tea waiting for me compliments of Charlie and Jack. Daniel actually wanted to leave Jay and come with me to pick up Charlie at the ski hill and I got a hug out of it too!  Jay has been a huge blessing.  He has such an amazing intuition of knowing the best way to help the littles adjust.  I am jealous!  So glad to be on this journey with him.  I know I couldn't do it without him!!  He always sees the positive!  Finally, the other morning I woke up after a long night without sleep and found a note from Sally with a Bible verse written out: "Do you know? Have you heard? The Lord is the everlasting God, the creator of the ends of the earth.  He will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no one can fathom.  He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak.  Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the Lord will renew strength.  They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not faint." Isaiah 40:28-31
I am clinging to this!  God is so good to give me a daughter that points me back to him!

We appreciate so much the meals and encouragement from everyone!! We are hoping we don't gain a lot of weight!! Please continue to pray for us to settle into a routine.  I know it's still early, but it would be so helpful for me.  And also that Lydia would fine peace and be able to rest and sleep soundly.  I need to get to bed!!  Good night all!

Mbayo!

"Mbayo" That's the word I hear often from Daniel.  I don't know what it means exactly but I do know to him it means get away and give me my space!  He follows it with smacking his lips which I thought was cute at first but realize now I'm pretty sure he means "kiss off".  We are keeping our sense of humor about it!  We did have a better day today, which I praise God for.  Jay was gone for an hour this morning when he woke up and I was able to bathe him and he gave me a cuddle after I got him some milk.  He also played downstairs with me and pretended to feed me and let me help him in the bathroom.  I didn't hear "Mbayo" as many times as I did the day before!  All seem like small things but we are looking for the blessings and God is faithful to show us where they are.  I was able to get out today for an hour with Sally, which was a huge blessing!  We went out for coffee and roamed the bookstore and had a good cry in the car. Just what I needed!  Please pray for our birth children.  They are so helpful and want so badly for things to go well.  We are all in a bit of shock that we could not really have prepared for. Pray that they know how extremely loved and important they are to us and that this is temporary.  It will get better!! We brought Belle back into the picture today, which I was a little concerned about.  Dogs are not pets in Africa and are actually very scarey so we didn't know how they would react to her.  They don't like her, but they are not freaking out.  They come to us to hold them when she comes around, but they are not screaming and crying.  Belle is actually fine with that.  She doesn't really like little kids that much, so this is a win for her!  This is an answer to prayer for me.  I was up a lot last night trying to think of a way to make it go smoothly and praying that it would.  Jase went and got her, brought her home while they were in their seats at the table and they pretty much just continued eating.  Really a non issue.  Why do I waste so much time worrying?  God is already there and has it all figured out!

Jay just reminded me of something God has taught us through Daniel and Lydia.  They both eat absolutely everything placed in front of them and Daniel will even scrape the bowl with his hand to get all of the sauce.  Daniel saw one of the kids scrape their plate into the garbage with some food on it and we caught him going into the garbage to get it out.  He is also very protective of his clothes and will get them from the laundry basket and carry them around pointing to himself.  I have to sneak them into the closet.  He especially is so grateful for every need that is met.  What an incredible reminder to us of God's generous provision to us that we take so for granted.

 Lydia likes headbands so she takes Sally's and puts them on her head!

 Sisters!!

 Kiki and Papa brought over black Raggedy Ann and Andy for Daniel and Lydia.  It was a hit!  So thoughtful!

 Mmmm! lunch time!  Daniel and Charlie...

 All dressed for winter! They lasted about 5 minutes outside.

Time to cut the little letters out of Lydia's hair.  They really bug her at night.  I can't imagine the time it took to put them in her hair.  She wasn't crying because it hurt, she dropped her little play phone on the ground. Notice the headband around her neck!

 I don't think I will have time to write thank you notes to all that have been so generous in their support, but please know that it means so much!! The meals, the clothes and offers to come and clean are so appreciated.  I will ask for help from you, I know we can't do this alone and God has brought each one of you on this journey with us.  Please keep the texts and calls and emails coming.  We may not have time to get back to you but they really do encourage us.  Above all, continue to pray!

This is hard!!

So here we are at the close of day 3 and this is hard!!  We are hanging in there!  Please keep the prayer coming.  Lydia has transitioned really well.  She has an amazing disposition and babbles and sings constantly in Lingala.  We have no idea what she's saying but she doesn't seem to mind.  She does wake up in the night with nightmares so we are trying to comfort her and she goes back to sleep pretty quickly.  Daniel is a little more challenging because he is older with a more difficult history.  He was severely malnourished and has some developmental delays but he is talking and interacts pretty well.  He calls Lydia Di (Dikiefu)  and looks out for her for the most part.  He is extremely bonded to Jay and acts angry at times with me. He really doesn't want much to do with me.  I have read that this happens frequently with toddlers because their primary caregivers have been women that to them have abandoned them.  It doesn't make it any easier though, because I don't feel as connected to him and there is a measure of guilt that comes with that.  We are busy all the time because we have not been able to establish a routine yet. It is very difficult to do this when you don't have the credibility of the months and years before now.  We practically have to hold Daniel down to get him to go to sleep at night but when he falls asleep it is for 12-14 hours.  I know we'll figure it all out, but it seems so difficult right now.  I do miss my old life! ;-)  I am trying to remember what God called me to in the light, to give me strength in the dark. Thank you to all of you for your support!  I don't have time to post pics tonight but will try to tomorrow.  We have some good ones!  They experienced going outside for the first time today in their winter jackets.  They were all smiles!  I'm going to get ready for bed and get ready for a new day tomorrow!

Officially Home!!

Wow!  What a whirlwind this day has been!!  Everyone slept well, except me.  I was on an adrenaline high so I just listened to the heavy breathing around me!!  Lydia woke up at about 6 and when she turned and saw my face she got this incredibly startled look on her face!  She began to whimper but quickly settled down with a diaper change and cuddle.  We had to wake Daniel up from a deep sleep at 7:45 so we could hit the road.  We fed the kids scrambled eggs from the buffet that Jay brought back since we got a free breakfast!  They eat anything we give them and Daniel will continue to eat until we take it away.  He eats very quickly too.  We were told children who suffered from malnutrition often do this and we know he was extremely malnurished when they found him.  We allowed them some freedom in the back of the van for a  few hours and they played.  Daniel peaked around the corner of the seat and yelled to Jay, "Papa" for him to look, which quickly turned into a game of throwing things to the front of the van.  We could tell they were getting tired so we pulled over and put them in their car seats for a good two hour nap.  It worked out great!  We stopped for lunch then finished the last leg of the trek to crying and whining from two little ones that were DONE with traveling. Not too bad, all things considered.  We arrived home and took a tour of the house. They were eager to explore and Jase was home to welcome them.  We gave them both a much needed bath and hung out in their room a little while.  Sally came home and they gave her a big hug!  I forgot to tell you that I showed them a photo book all the way home of the family with their pictures in it.  They loved and kissed the pictures of the family when they looked at it, unprompted by me.  Their foster mom did a great job of preparing them!!  Anyway, they loved playing with Sally and finally Charlie and Jack too!  They got pretty wound up, which leads to some crazy behavior that needed to be delt with and that was hard. It's very difficult to discipline when you don't have a real relationship yet!  We finally got them down at about 7:30.  We're hoping we can transition them quickly to our time zone.  God truly has been so amazingly faithful to us and we praise him for that.  I must say, though, that this is by far the hardest thing our family has done.  While they are very cute, they are very busy and require all of our patience.  I am afraid the cuteness is going to wear off, but for now we are hanging in there.  I am trying not to look past tomorrow right now.  We are fully dependent on God and I know that is right where he wants us to be.  We are so grateful for our amazing support system!!  We could not do this with out you all!! I'm going to get ready for bed and hopefully get some sleep tonight!

 Daniel sleeps soundly but he is wild!

 Ahhh! Nap time!

 Breakfast on the go!

 We are learning stairs as quickly as possible.

 Yum!  An afternoon snack.

 Lydia's turn at stairs!!

They are here!!

What a day!!  We left at Bend at 2 AM and arrived in Cincinatti at 10:00.  Our hotel was very accomodating and let us check in and get cleaned up!  We set our for the airport and arrived at 1:00, ate some lunch and went to the waiting area.  The other two families arrived and we sat and chatted, then waited, and waited, and waited some more.  It took them 2 1/2 hours to get through customs!  Finally we saw them at the end of the hall holding hands and walking together.  They were exhausted!!  They walked into our arms as if they knew it was meant to be and we took turns embracing them!  Daniel was soaked to the bone so we cleaned him up and Lydia gave us the gift of a poop right from the start!  It's like we never left that stage.  We stayed and talked with the escort who gave us some wonderful information.  She told us Lydia is a spit fire, singing and dancing and talking the whole flight!  We arrived at the hotel and gave them a bath.  They just kept looking at us and hugged us tightly every time we picked them up. Daniel is much bigger than we thought.  I think I'm going to do a little shopping for size 3T! We gave them some banana, some milk and ordered some room service chicken fingers that they gobbled up.  They played for a little while, then Daniel pointed to his private area.  I thought he was trying to tell me he had to go potty so I took him to the toilet and to my incredible surprise, he went!!  I think he is potty trained!  Unbelievable!  Lydia talks constantly but we have no idea what she is saying and Daniel investigates the toys to see how they work saying little but looking at us for affirmation.  God has overshadowed this whole experience in an incredible way.  I don't think it could have gone any better!!  We'll see how tomorrow goes, but for now we're all going to get some sleep.  They both just dropped dead in the bed!! Love you all and we'll try to post more tomorrow!!

Here we go!!

Hello Friends and Family!!
We are excited to let you know that we are finally picking up our two precious additions to the family!  Daniel and Lydia will be arriving at the Cincinnati International Airport on Wed. Jan. 9 at 2:30 from the Democratic Republic of Congo and we will probably have them in our arms an hour or so later.  As you can imagine, we have just about every emotion imaginable going on right now.  We know we are up for some challenging days ahead so we treasure your prayer because we know it is what will sustain us!  We thought this would be the best way to get the word out to everyone as things progress on our journey. We want to make sure those who want to know will be able to and those who don't won't have to!  
We appreciate you all so much and are grateful to have you on this journey with us!!