Monday, January 13, 2014

One Year Ago...



Wow!!  I can't believe it was one year ago today that we were a ball of nerves in an airport with our little backpacks ready trying to anticipate what we would need and how our new son and daughter would respond to us!  What a journey this has been for our entire family.  I can honestly say this has been one of the best and worst years of my life.  God has shown so much of His character in this one year of our lives.  I have learned that just because God calls you to do something doesn't mean it's going to be easy, in fact if He's calling you to do it, it probably means it's going to be something you can only do in His strength.  I have never experienced the desperate need for God that I did the first 2 months of Daniel and Lydia's arrival. I knew this was going to be a difficult transition, but nothing could prepare me for just how difficult it was going to be.  Our little ones were broken and wounded.  We had no idea what their history included and what baggage they were bringing to our family.  Daniel especially struggled to understand that we were not going to leave him.  We were not like the other experiences he had with people, especially women, that were closest to him.  I don't want to cast a negative light on his birth mom and foster mom, because I don't know what sacrifices they had to make for Daniel, but Daniel did not trust me and pushed me away continually.  Every attempt I made to bond and attach, he would push me away.  This is something we continue to struggle with but there is healing and God has taught me so much about His love for me, as I strive to show love to Daniel even when he doesn't show love to me.

As I think about where we were at this time last year, I can't believe where we are now.  Both Daniel and Lydia are an integral part of our family.  They make us laugh, cry, scream with frustration and melt with joy like their brothers and sister. They are in a good routine now and most days it's hard to remember life without them.  They love playing pretend, especially going to school like the big kids.  They are coloring pictures, doing puzzles, making train tracks, pretending to care for their babies, jumping on the bed and into all kinds of mischief including putting on my make up during a room time.  Daniel went from looking like a black cup of coffee to a coffee with creamer!  Not funny, but funny!  They have also expanded their TV show repertoire from just Barney to include Daniel Tiger's Neighborhood (Daniel says "I want to watch me") and Sesame Street, both of which are much more tolerable to watch with them!  They are learning at an alarming rate and observe everything.  I am always amazed at how aware they are of their surroundings, noticing everything! Daniel can recognize where we are going by the route we take and will let me know if he thinks I am going the wrong way because I didn't go the usual way. Lydia decided she was ready to wear underwear and in a day she was trained.  She is really going to go places with her determination!

You can certainly tell they come from a "warm" culture and by warm I mean that they love to interact with people.  Christmas was especially neat.  They understood what it was about so readily.  We talked about Jesus' birthday and they interacted with the nativity sets moving the characters around and naming them.  They had no idea they were supposed to get presents, so the focus was on Jesus the whole time.  We modified things as a family, focusing less on gifts and more on relationship and Jack said it was the best Christmas ever!   Daniel and Lydia love interacting with all of their cousins on both sides of the family.  You can tell they are feeling more and more secure with their place. They love adventure and want to try anything the other kids do.  They jumped right in the water of the swimming pool, road the inner tube behind the boat, jumped on the snowmobile and were pulled behind on a tube.  They went sledding in Michigan with their cousins and by the end Daniel was going down the hill by himself. We are amazed at their willingness to try different things and are so grateful for it!

We can see that they will always have some issues to process through with some rough times ahead, but we are confident that even at their most difficult times, God will be their strength and He will show Himself to them.  Lydia still thinks that every black person she encounters is from Congo and shouts it out wherever we are (kind of embarrassing in Wal Mart). Daniel still can't make a choice without going back and forth several times and this is usually at bedtime when we are exhausted and have no patience. 

I don't know what else to say.  Adoption is not for the faint of heart, it's really hard!  My body is constantly aching and I have a standing chiropractor appointment! I cry out to God on a daily basis for patience and strength.  While we are exhausted we have also had the privilege of watching a miracle unfold every day. Daniel and Lydia are a beautiful picture of redemption and even at it's most difficult times it's still worth it!  We love Daniel and Lydia more than we can say and they are ours...Mundingers to the end!

One of my friends sent me the link to Jen Hatmaker's blog and this entry hit me to the core because it gives such a clear picture of what life is really like after the airport.  If you are interested in reading it get ready to have a good laugh and cry....it's worth it!!

http://jenhatmaker.com/blog/2011/09/06/after-the-airport


The Family!!

Brothers

sisters!

Daniel

I did it!!

 
Daniel and Lydia re arranging the nativity set for the 20th time!
Lydia loves her Papa!

Following the stars to the nativity on Christmas morning!

Daniel finally has a book of his own to look through!!

Sally and Lydia ready to sled down the hill!

The little cousins at Meijer Gardens in front of the African Christmas tree.

More fun at Meijer Gardens with the cousins!